All About Bipolar: My son has depression.
Posted By atorturedsoul on May 6, 2009
Sunny side of the street
I had a very busy afternoon yesterday and it has been a long morning. Where shall I begin?
My 17-year-old son told me a few weeks ago that he was having issues with anxiety and depression. We waited a little while to see if it would pass but he recently began having panic attacks and things were getting much worse. He came to me and asked me for help so I made him an appointment with my doctor. Unfortunately, he was out because of a death in the family so we ended up seeing his stand in yesterday afternoon. I cannot stand the woman at all.
Anyway, he explained to her what he had been dealing with. Let me say that my son smokes cigarettes. I am not thrilled about it but he lives with his grandmother so the most I can do is try to nudge him towards quitting. I do not buy them for him. Having said that, this woman had some nerve. She told him that smoking caused his anxiety, loss of appetite and insomnia. She went on to say that all of his symptoms could be explained by smoking and she suggested that he take 30 minute walks each day…to help his depression. Are you kidding me? I understand explaining to him that smoking is harmful to your health. I really do. My son was afraid and ashamed to go to the doctor and I stressed to him that it was important to be completely honest so they would know exactly what was going on and how to treat it. This is why he was honest and told them that he smokes. Again, I am not happy he smokes but I was proud of him for being honest. How can I expect him to be honest with the doctor if she threatens, belittles and makes light of his issues? Oh yes. She belittled him and then threatened him with legal repercussions for smoking. She made light of his concerns by telling him everything was caused by him smoking. This poor kid is trying to reach out for help because he can no longer deal with the depression and the doctor basically tells him that it is all his fault. He already feels like he is worthless and can’t do anything right so let’s just tell him that he caused his depression. Lovely, doc.
Like I said, I am not happy about him smoking but good god. This kid is reaching out for help for depression and she all but slaps him in the face. Honestly, lady. Do you think I haven’t tried to tell him it is bad for him? Do you think I haven’t tried to talk him into quitting? Do you think I condone it? She asked him who bought them for him because she thought I did. Seriously? I know there are parents who do buy cigarettes for their kid but I am not one of them. Anyway, enough about the smoking already. My son is depressed and possibly suicidal. He needs help now. You can give him a lecture later. He doesn’t need you to make him feel worse about himself right now.
I honestly was beginning to think she wasn’t going to give him anything. She finally decided to write him a prescription for Lexapro. I have taken a lot of medications over the years but this is one I have not taken. I asked her if he should watch for any particular side effects. She said, “Oh no. This is one that doesn’t have side effects.” Really? Everything I have read about antidepressants causing suicidal thoughts and an increased risk of suicide in children, teens and young adults and you don’t even mention that he should come back immediately if he has any thoughts of suicide? I guess the smoking issue was more important. I will look up Lexapro and warn him about potential side effects myself so he can let me know. He has to go back in two weeks and thankfully my regular doctor will be there. I will never take him to her again.
C’mon, doc. Let’s focus on pulling him out of his depression and then you can tackle the smoking issue. Doesn’t that make more sense?
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All About Bipolar: My son has depression. – I had a very busy afternoon yesterday and it has been a long morning. W… http://bit.ly/Be4MX
All About Bipolar: My son has depression. | All About Bipolar http://bit.ly/zI2WE
All About Bipolar: My son has depression. – I had a very busy afternoon yesterday and it has been a long morning. W… http://bit.ly/Be4MX
All About Bipolar: My son has depression. – I had a very busy afternoon yesterday and it has been a long morning. W… http://bit.ly/Be4MX
All About Bipolar: My son has depression. | All About Bipolar http://bit.ly/zI2WE
All About Bipolar: My son has depression. | All About Bipolar http://bit.ly/zI2WE
Are you going to tell the regular doctor about this? This is something that shouldn’t go unchallenged or unreported. The woman is a fiend.
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During his two week follow up we will be seeing my regular doctor. I fully intend to tell him how disappointed I was in how this woman treated my son. I honestly think that if he had went in the room without me that she wouldn’t have given him anything at all – other than a lecture. I suppose she doesn’t realize how serious depression is in teens. It’s my son’s life she was playing with and I intend to make sure she doesn’t do it with anyone else. Considering that he is depressed, I am just thankful that he hasn’t turned to drugs or alcohol.
He’s really not a bad kid. He was home schooled for a year and a half because he didn’t interact well with the other kids. He’s more mature than most of them and has little in common with kids his own age. (I think this adds to his depression.)
He came to me right before his 17th birthday and said school work was boring because it was too easy. His plan was to quit right after his birthday (in December) and get his GED so he could move on to a secondary school. Despite my reservations, I supported his decision. He quit in January and went and took his pre-test that same month. In March, he took the test and received his scores in the mail the first week of April. He passed with a 99% in literature and 97% in science. He should be a junior in high school but he has his GED.
He is entering a trade school in the fall (an 18 month course) while other kids his age will be entering their senior year. In fact, he will have one third of his studies done before he turns 18 and 2/3 done before he would have graduated high school. He will be done before his friends enter their first semester in college. To keep him on track with his plan, we have to get his depression under control so we can get him registered and ready to go. If smoking is the worst thing he does in life then I don’t think that’s too bad. I am worried about his future and this could be a major setback if not properly treated.
Oh boy! I have written a novel. Summing it up, I will be letting the regular doctor know his stand in’s attitude isn’t going to cut it.
Thanks for your post. I would like to suggest a website with lots more information about depression and anxiety.
http://www.lifeworkscommunity.com
Also, I would recommend you take a look at the Life Works Community Blog for some great inspiration from the Life Works counsellors.